Getting sick sucks. I have a ton of catch up work to do, holidays to contend with, and availability of everyone dissipates like smoke in the air. My goals smashed against the wall of flu and shattered so I cannot get done this month what I set out to finish. It frustrates me, but no more than anything else. I’ve achieved a lot thus far in 2013. I am not unproud of my accomplishments this year. The list is mighty as it is. I got more done in 2013 than 2007-2012 combined. Yet, I feel like I’m failing. I did not get done what I wanted this year.
The Movie Cliche series languishes, Accidental Art remains unshot, and miscellaneous other little projects. I cannot stand leaving things unfinished. It drives me bonkers. Even when the delays are legitimate, just tickles my OCD and my skin crawls.
I’ve been so busy, it hasn’t even dawned on me that we’re a few days away from 2014. I just don’t feel the passage of time like I used to. Time flies by like a supersonic jet, leaving life in the contrails.
I have a lot of deep contemplation to give to my future, specifically this coming year. I have two roads I can travel and choosing which one to dedicate my time to means a serious, multi year commitment of time.
Time, the thing that I have so little of as it is. I lost a lot of it this past week, along with money. I’m losing more time than money. I’m losing time more than my hair. I can’t get time back. Time runs out and I end up at a crawl.
“I thought that you’d be loving me. I thought you were the one who’d stay forever. But now forever’s come and gone and I’m still here alone.”
– Eric Clapton