Some days you just relish accomplishing a lot, you know? Put together another 30 minute episode of Clip Frames. Got more segments edited for FRAMELINES. Yesterday totally made up for a lot of lost time. The Sonnyboo Intern Army was hard at work with preliminary edits and DVD duplication. Worked on two client projects and just plain got a lot done. After a week of false starts, incomplete work, and technical glitches; yesterdays pick ax approach felt so much better. Monday will be a big FRAMELINES strategy day, plotting out the next seasons direction and timing. Oh, got the entire first season re-laid to tape with corrected and exact Closed Captions along with the first 3 episodes of the second season for broadcast, so another goal met this week.
I even went to the gym after work. Not too strenuous, but still better than just loafing or working whilst sitting before the computer monitor. The New Rossdonia Cleaning/Disinfection Process will commence today too. No escaping the vacuuming and dishes today. It’s on the agenda and won’t be denied. Having done a lot of the little cleaning all week means the two big jobs are all that’s left.
I need to shoot more. I feel more alive when I’m near a camera and actors. I hate these contests though. I’m not motivated by competition with other people. Film is art, not a sport. I’m already plenty motivated just by the movies and ideas in and of themselves. I just need to appease myself and right now, that means I have to be 100% on board with the movie and how it’s going to turn out.
I am doing everything I can not to slip back. I don’t want to feel anger, depression, sorrow, or regret. Emotions are not voluntary. Everything I do now is about trying to control my own feelings. If I sense anger coming, I go to the gym and wear myself out. When depression creeps up, I try to edit or watch something positive and uplifting. When regret come on, I have no choice right now but to sit up and pay attention. I haven’t found the counter to that one yet.
I’m starting to send out the Cell Phone Monologues as a single short out to several festivals. Combine that with updates and new episodes of Clip Frames to TV stations around the area, and I’m getting back into the swing of marketing.
Now if only I could just stop the infections from ripping my skin apart and blood from pouring out of holes…. That would be nice.
“This is the springtime of my loving, the second season I am to know. You are the sunlight in my growing, so little warmth I’ve felt before. “